The Mom Guilt is always there.
It’s in the baskets of unfolded laundry and dirty dishes that are left behind when you choose to spend time with your children. It’s in the tidy kitchen and freshly folded towels that you choose to take care of rather than sit with your child. It’s in the breakfast that consisted of sugary cereal or the Happy Meal at lunch time. It’s in the fruit you haven’t managed to fill the fridge with yet because you haven’t made it to the grocery store. It’s in the Kraft Dinner and hot dogs at suppertime.
The guilt is always near, always present. It’s in the money you didn’t have for sports, and the six dollars you spent on yourself for a shirt that was in the clearance rack. It’s that voice in your head that tells you that your sandals with the straps that are just barely hanging on will hold up for another summer, but she will sure love this unicorn t-shirt.
There it is again, when you’ve had a rough day and things are falling apart around you, and you find yourself snapping at your child who wanted another piece of you when you just wanted one piece for yourself. Just a tiny piece. Maybe just five minutes to drink your coffee. Maybe a few minutes to just breathe.
We all know when the Mom Guilt is the loudest, and the most present.
It’s when we lay our heads down at night to finally go to sleep. It’s there, keeping us awake, asking if we’ve done enough. Asking if we were good enough, and scolding ourselves for not being enough. Its there telling ourselves that we will be better mothers tomorrow.
It’s strong, this Mom Guilt. It plays over the memories of the times you’ve kissed your child and offered snuggles and hugs and wiped tears. It buries the pride that was in your voice when you were cheering on the sidelines and watching them tie their shoes and reminding them what wonderful little beings they are. It somehow roars louder than the sounds of happy giggles and words of love spoken in tiny voices.
These are mothers. We’ve made mistakes, and will make more. But our love is fierce. A love like no other. A love that can both break your heart, and fill it with so much joy that you think it will burst.
Through our mistakes and our tears, it will always be love that our children will remember the most, and a single photo of you with your children will be something they will thank you for when they are grown and have children of their own. When they are grown, it will be something you will be so glad you did.
May 12th. Take a few moments from your day to gift yourself photos with your children that will last a lifetime. No guilt required.